1- Stop Saying I love you- This is simple but profound. These three words not only express how you feel but they show your spouse that those feeling you have are strong enough to carry you to action. When you stop saying I love you it is easy to forget what too often is just assumed in married couple. That they really do love each other.
2- Entertain Immoral Thoughts- Thoughts like these destroy the respect you have for your wife. Intimacy isn’t a public thing it is between you and your one and only.
3- Stop really listening- Want to ruin a good thing, multitask while you are listening to your wife or husband. When your ears tune them out so will your heart. You are showing them that they are only worth half of your effort or that something else ranks as highly as they do.
4- Yell- Raising your voice only brings out defense tactics. Keep a cool calm voice and your point will be heard
5- Accuse- blame your spouse for everything and make them the enemy in your argument. You can ask them to change something they do but don’t accuse them and insult them while you do.
6- Lie- Lying to your spouse is a sure fire way to take three steps backwards in your marriage. You have worked long and hard for their trust; don’t destroy that in one simple situation.
7- Work All Your Time- Don’t spend so much time trying to make a living that you forget to make a life. Take time for what really matters.
8- Remember Old Wrongs- People change and grow, we expect others to realize that about us but often forget that principal with those we love most. Let your spouse change. Don’t bring up old wrongs to prove a point, let them change and move on.
9- Don’t be overly sensitive- Don’t expect your spouse to never disagree or offend you. Those are unreal expectations, be open instead to their opinion trying as hard as possible to not take it personally.
10- Expect ESP- Expecting your spouse to read your mind will never help. If you want them to know something tell them don’t expect them to just know if you have never said anything to them.

Marriage takes work and caution but the rewards a good strong marriage brings are endless. Make a commitment together that you will in the future avoid these so you have more time to do constructive activities.

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Steps On How To Save A Marriage

Communicating

The communication gap is one of the biggest reasons behind marriages falling apart. When you keep your feelings bottled up inside you, they develop into resentment over time. One fine day, you erupt like a volcano, thus destroying your relationship. Also, you start fighting over petty issues due to the frustration that you have developed by not communicating freely with your partner.

No, you need not scream at top of your lungs, “Save my marriage!” What you need to do is remain calm and collected while talking about an issue with your partner. If there’s something you don’t like about your mate, tell him. Never assume that your partner would know how you feel. The trick lies in an intelligent choice of words and being precise.

Listening

Men, take notice! The most common complaint from women is that men don’t listen. Listening is different from hearing. The former involves receiving and assimilating what the other person is saying with regard to their concern. Listen till your partner finishes up and is satisfied with what they say. You might be tempted to interfere or defend. This is the biggest mistake.

Processing

This involves pondering over what your partner said and formulating ways to change your habits to solve the problem.

Resolving

This involves discussing the issue with your partner and expressing a willingness to change yourself. You need to keep your ego aside. There are no ways to save a marriage where there is a clash of egos. So, instead of pleading in despair, “save my marriage”, say “sorry”. This little word has the power to save your marriage!

Imagine this: your partner comes home late. He doesn’t call to inform you about this. You are furious. You expect him to call but you have never said this to him. When he comes back home, you scream at him. Your partner reacts in the same manner. He doesn’t understand what you want. The situation gets so bad over time that you finally have to resort to the cry of “save my marriage!”

Now imagine this: your partner comes home late. He hasn’t called. You remain calm and explain to him that you would feel better if he had called up to say, “Honey, I would be late tonight.” Your partner would understand what you want. He would definitely promise to call you up in the future. You hug and kiss him! The issue is resolved!

Save my marriage? Eh? It already is saved!

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